When parents with children are going through a divorce, things may become difficult when considering how they will both remain a vital part of the child’s life. This is where co-parenting comes in. The ultimate goal of co-parenting is to make sure that the child always feels loved by both parents and this can be accomplished by the parents working together.

What is co-parenting?

Co-parenting requires both parents to treat each other with respect and cooperation and put the child’s wellbeing at the center. It means setting aside any negative feelings and communicating in a healthy way. Co-parenting ensures that both parents continue to be in the child’s life and continue working together to create a healthy environment for everyone involved.

Why is it important to work together as co-parents?

Joint custody agreements can create tension, especially if the parenting styles of each parent do not mesh. Many factors could be involved, including disputes related to the children s’ education and extracurricular activities, pickup times and drop-offs, medical issues, and in some instances, deep feelings of resentment if infidelity was a cause of the divorce. Regardless of what occurred in the marriage, both parents must be calm, consistent, and be present to make co-parenting work for the benefit of the children.

When parents effectively co-parent, a consistency in rule enforcement and other decisions are easier to obtain. Working together this way will avoid two different rules at two different households. Co-parenting the right way enhances communication as it encourages parents to respect each other’s wishes and decisions.  This keeps the parents on the same page and creates consistency in the child’s life, as well as the lives of the parents, thereby creating a more peaceful environment for the whole family.

What are the Benefits of a Collaborative Divorce Process for Co-Parenting?

One of the benefits of the Collaborative Divorce process is that the professionals involved are trained to resolve disputes by identifying the needs and interests of the parties and finding solutions that best meet the parties’ circumstances. This process itself can be a teaching guide for some of the co-parenting skills needed. When parents are able to put aside their differences and work together regardless of what might have happened in their marriage, it makes a better environment for the children and ultimately a better place for the parents to be in so that they can come up with the best solutions.

Children need to see both parents working together to thrive. Seeing the parents put aside their differences to work together to find solutions sets a great example for the children to follow when dealing with others. It not only teaches children valuable problem-solving skills that they can use throughout their life but also enables them to feel secure in knowing that they, too, can be problem solvers in their own lives as adults.

If you need help in a divorce or family law matter, please contact Kim Mediation and Law and schedule your free 15-minute phone consultation.