Using Mediation for a Cohabitation Agreement
When couples decide to live together without getting married, they may not realize how valuable a cohabitation agreement can be. While it is common to hear about mediation being used for prenuptial agreements, many people don’t know that mediation can also be an effective tool for creating a cohabitation agreement. The goal is to help the couple come to a mutual understanding about how their lives, especially financially, will function while they live together.
What Can Be Addressed in a Cohabitation Agreement?
Cohabitation agreements often cover things like:
In some cases, people entering into cohabitation bring significant assets into the relationship and want to ensure that those assets remain separate. For example, I once worked with a client who wasn’t getting married but had significant separate property. She wanted to be clear that her boyfriend had no claim to it if the relationship ended.
In another case, a couple was planning to buy a home together. They weren’t planning to marry but wanted to make sure they were on the same page about who owned what and what would happen if they parted ways.
Why Mediation Works
Unlike the potentially adversarial feel of drafting a prenuptial agreement with separate lawyers from the outset, mediation creates a space for couples to talk things through with a neutral facilitator. The mediator helps guide the conversation, raise important questions, and ensure that both parties are heard.
If complex issues arise, the mediator can recommend that each person consult their own attorney for independent legal advice before finalizing the agreement.
Who Should Consider a Cohabitation Agreement?
Anyone planning to move in with a partner—especially if:
- How finances will be shared
- Who will pay for what expenses
- What happens if the couple breaks up
- Whether there are any claims to support or property after separation
- How jointly purchased property (like a home) will be titled and divided
In California, for instance, there’s the well-known Marvin v. Marvin case involving actor Lee Marvin. He lived with his partner for 20 years, and when the relationship ended, she claimed he was obligated to continue supporting her. The court ruled that since they weren’t married, and there was no written agreement, there was no legal duty for support. A properly written cohabitation agreement can help avoid that kind of ambiguity by clearly stating that no claims of support or partnership rights arise from living together.
Final Thoughts
Mediation can absolutely be used to negotiate a cohabitation agreement. It provides a respectful, productive environment for couples to define the terms of their partnership. It can lay a strong foundation for understanding and fairness, something every relationship benefits from, whether there is a marriage certificate or not.
If you are considering moving in with your partner and want to protect your interests while preserving your relationship, a mediated cohabitation agreement could be the right step forward.
Lynette Kim is a Los Angeles based attorney specializing in Mediation and Collaborative Divorce solutions. She is keenly aware of the emotional toll divorce can have on you and your family and is committed to helping you navigate your divorce through the Mediation and Collaborative Divorce processes. She strongly believes a peaceful divorce is possible, resulting in a happier outcome for you and your family.
The Kim Mediation and Law Center is located at 3710 Wilshire Blvd in Los Angeles, CA. You can make an appointment by calling 213-351-1000 or visit www.kimmediationandlaw.com
Compassion for my clients is important to me, and that’s why I’ve remained a family law practitioner for 30 years — and still love what I do. I’m keenly aware of the emotional toll divorce can have on you and your family. As you navigate the rough waters of transition, my team and I will help you find your balance. We’re here to support you in making the best decisions for your future. I’ve seen the positive results again and again when couples embrace meditation or collaborative divorce. I’d be honored to share these practices with you and set your family on a healthy path.
