Anger is a natural human emotion, and it is normal to be upset in certain situations. If it is not managed well, anger can lead to negative consequences, especially in conflict situations like a divorce.

5 Tips for how to manage anger during a divorce mediation:

1. Take a break.

When emotions run high, it is helpful to take a step back and allow yourself or your spouse to cool down. This break can be short or long, depending on the intensity of the feelings. During this break, you can process how you feel and come back to the mediation session with a clearer mind.

2. Venting is recommended.

Venting can be helpful to allow you or your spouse to feel heard.  During mediation, it is expected for each spouse to express how each person feels. However, as the mediator, it is my responsibility to ensure that the venting does not turn into a personal attack.

3. Try to understand where the anger is coming from.

Understanding where that anger is coming from can be helpful to both you and your spouse. As a mediator, I ask open-ended questions to uncover the root cause of the negative feelings.

4. Reframe the situation.

Sometimes, anger can stem from a perceived injustice or feeling of loss. I can help you to reframe the situation by focusing on the future and the benefits of the agreement rather than the losses.

5. Practice empathy.

Empathy involves putting yourself in your spouse’s shoes and understanding their feelings and perspectives. When you feel understood, it can help to reduce negative feelings and improve communication.

In conclusion, managing anger during divorce mediation can be challenging, but it is essential for a successful outcome. The mediator should create a safe space for both parties to express their emotions, when necessary take a break, understand the root cause of the anger, help reframe the situation, and practice empathy. With these tips, you and your spouse can work towards a peaceful and satisfactory agreement.

Talk to an Experienced Los Angeles Divorce Attorney and Mediator

Lynette Kim is a Los Angeles Divorce Attorney and Mediator. Her many years of experience will help you to effectively manage your emotions throughout the divorce process. For more information or to schedule a consultation call 213-351-1000. Our office is located at 3701 Wilshire Blvd, Suite 508, Los Angeles, CA 90010.