Some spouses head into the divorce process with the idea that it is going to be difficult and that the divorce process will be a battlefield. Both Parties might fight for everything they think they are entitled to, but, fighting is unnecessary, and you may find that entitlement is something that does not enter into the actual process. Courts frown upon the word “entitled”. It often makes the judge cringe arguing for something that leans towards entitlement. That point of view emboldens push back from the other Party and impedes the attempt at settlement and Court strongly encourages couples to settle without court intervention.
Some couples fight over everything, even going so far as dividing the silverware equally. But continual belligerence on both sides increases the cost for divorce as time is spent on insignificant things that could easily be solved by compromise.
Not only is this type of fighting emotionally draining, but it is also costly. You are paying for an attorney’s time and expertise. Going back and forth over every issue forces your attorney to prepare and spend time in court litigating. The attorney’s time costs you money, so the more you fight, the higher your legal fees will be.
Mediation is Better than Fighting for “Entitlements”
Mediation is a way to resolve your “entitlement” issues without fighting. A trained mediator meets with both you and your spouse and guides you through the decision-making process, so you and your spouse can make your own divorce settlement decisions.
An expert can be called in to help you understand your current financial situation and what a court would probably decide if you wanted to take the issues to court.
With the help of a mediator, you can come to a settlement agreement that you believe is equitable. You and your spouse learn to compromise. You may feel that you could have gotten “more” if you had gone to court, but your out-of-pocket fees for your attorney may offset what you gained. After mediation, you will be able to move forward with your life without any or very little animosity toward your spouse and this allows for a more peaceful separation.
Contact Kim Mediation and Law Center for Help