Can You Use Mediation for Divorce if There is Spousal Abuse?
Going through a divorce is tough enough, and it becomes even more difficult when there is spousal abuse. Many couples opt for Mediation to resolve their divorce amicably, but the question arises: Is Mediation appropriate or even possible in cases of spousal abuse?
The answer is nuanced.
Mediation can be an option in abusive relationships, but it requires careful consideration and special precautions. Before the mediation process begins, it is a standard practice for the mediator to conduct a thorough check with both parties to identify any existing domestic violence restraining orders. If such orders are in place, it signals the need for extra caution.
Mediating in the presence of spousal abuse hinges on the mediator’s ability to manage power imbalances effectively. This ensures that the abused spouse feels safe and is empowered to participate in the process. One way to achieve this is through separate meetings. While joint meetings are more time-efficient, separate sessions can provide a safe environment for the abused spouse, particularly in a virtual setting like Zoom. Here, each party can be placed in separate virtual rooms, allowing the mediation to proceed without direct interaction, which can be traumatic for the victim.
Moreover, having legal representation or a support person present during Mediation can be beneficial, especially for the abused spouse. This support can help the victim feel more confident and secure, enabling them to voice their concerns and negotiate effectively.
While Mediation is typically seen as a collaborative and less adversarial approach to divorce, in cases involving abuse the process must be handled with extreme care. The primary goal should be to protect the safety and well-being of the abused spouse while striving to reach a fair and equitable resolution. Therefore, Mediation is possible in these cases, but only under strict conditions that prioritize the safety and comfort of the spouse who has suffered domestic violence.
Domestic Abuse Hot Lines
If you are experiencing abuse in your relationship, there are confidential hotlines with professional counselors to talk to. The 24 Hour National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799 SAFE (7233). In Los Angeles, call the LA County’s Domestic Violence 24 Hour Support Services at 1-800-978-3600.
The Kim Mediation and Law Center is located at 3701 Wilshire Blvd, Suite 508 in Los Angeles, CA. You may make an appointment by calling 203-508-1000. Or visit www.kimmediationandlaw.com
Compassion for my clients is important to me, and that’s why I’ve remained a family law practitioner for 30 years — and still love what I do. I’m keenly aware of the emotional toll divorce can have on you and your family. As you navigate the rough waters of transition, my team and I will help you find your balance. We’re here to support you in making the best decisions for your future. I’ve seen the positive results again and again when couples embrace meditation or collaborative divorce. I’d be honored to share these practices with you and set your family on a healthy path.
